I’m struggling with this one a bit because there’s not much
to say. He’s 40ish, divorced,
non-practicing attorney with a cute dog.
Bald but attractive, quick smile, gentlemanly. But, I don’t know. There’s something missing. He’s seems damaged, a little lost. People say when they lose something or
someone who was very meaningful in their life, a piece of themselves gets lost
in the process. I can see that in
him. He’s definitely not whole. He’s got some personal and family issues
going on that I don’t feel right divulging, even anonymously. Conversation is slow but not excruciating and
the more he tells me about himself, the more I want to give him a hug. What I decidedly do NOT want to do is rip his
clothes off. Or anything remotely close
to that. Seems to be a genuinely good
person but I don’t think I want to sign up for this. I want someone a little more vibrant and
bright. I have enough of my own dark, I
need a little light. Maybe that makes me
a genuinely bad person. But it’s the
truth.
That’s really all I want to say about him. I feel like I’m locking my dog
outside in the rain saying the little I did.
So I’ll talk a bit about the pros and cons of
multi-dating:
Pros:
1.
It’s
impossible to get too caught up or obsessive with one guy because there just
isn’t the time for that. That puts a lot
less pressure on each situation and it’s much easier to relax into it and not
over analyze anything
2.
I’ve worn my one perfect date outfit on every
date and no one knows the difference.
Awesome.
3.
I’m learning a lot about myself and what I do
and don’t want. Something you’d think
wouldn’t take 30 something years to do but, here I am.
4.
It’s very exciting to meet new people and hear
their perspective on things. It’s nice
to open the window and let some fresh air in once in a while. Makes me appreciate the familiarity of my
friends all the more too. It’s also
refreshing to know that some guys do want to be gentlemen and treat women the
right way.
Cons:
1.
It’s
getting very difficult to remember what the hell I’m saying to all these
men. Seriously a problem.
2.
I have to triple check all my text messages
before I send them to make sure they are going to the right person
3.
I’m prone to sliding through experiences with my
eye on what’s next, instead of fully committing to the moment at hand. Always having the next date planned isn’t
doing much to help my focus
4.
The anxiety before the date is just
awful. There’s no other way to describe
it.
I do have to say though that most of the guys are just as,
if not more nervous, than I am. So you
do start out on a level playing field.
And, with the exception of the jack ass on date #2, they’ve been very
courteous and kind. Each of them has
paid for all food and drinks (although I’ve offered each time), been on time
and generally respectful. I guess there’s
not much more to ask for, really.
Next date is a 40 something real estate developer who lives
nearby. I have high hopes for this
one. Also on deck, a 39 year divorced
dad that I’ve been in contact with for about a week. Updates soon!
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